How old is this surgeon?

Have you ever been to an amusement park and stood in line for four hours for the biggest, fastest, longest, coolest roller coaster ever? When you finally reach the cars to load, you get in the back car. You lock the shoulder restraints and raise your hands excited for the journey about to begin. When suddenly you look to your left and you see the coaster operator in his booth and you think, "Is that guy old enough to operate this thing? He must be 16 years old, and he is going to work the brakes of this coaster?" Your arms slowly start to lower, the excitement you felt turns to worry or even fear as you think, "Does this kid have the skills to do this? Can he reach the buttons for the ride?" Well, that is sort of how I felt when I went to meet the surgeon today, except the 'operator' was much older than my example. After filling out pages and pages of paperwork, the nurse ushered my mother, father, and myself into a treatment room. We passed the doctor in his office as the nurse led us in. I took a quick glance at him in the office and a small knot developed in my stomach. As the nurse closed the door, I quickly looked at my parents and whispered, "How old is this guy?" He looked like my grandfather. I am usually not one to make judgements on how someone looks, but in this situation, my anxiety overruled, and I started to get worried.

With thoughts of my grandfather fresh in my mind, all I could think of was the Parkinson's he suffered from near the end of his life, and the constant shaking of his hands. I immediately associated visions of the surgeon with shaky hands. Within a few minutes, the surgeon came in and was quick to introduce himself and shake my hand. Surprisingly, he had soft, strong hands with no hint of Parkinson's. One point for the surgeon, no points for Jeremy's anxiety. As most surgeons are, he was not the most personable doctor. He did a quick examination of the area around my thyroid and jumped straight to the details of the procedure. All was fine and dandy until he started to explain the risks of the surgery. First he spoke of low blood calcium, no big deal. Second he spoke of risks of hoarseness. This one bothered me. He said there were three possibilities of hoarseness: 1. general hoarseness from the removal of the breathing tubes 2. short term hoarseness from bruising of the vocal chords 3. long term hoarseness from severing the nerve for the vocal chords. As he described the long term hoarseness, he used a raspy whisper and said, "you will sound like this for the rest of your life." Ok...one point for Jeremy's anxiety, no points for the surgeon. He even spoke about the possibility of death, and that didn't bother me, as I was still imagining this raspy whisper. For those that know me well, you know that singing is a big part of my life, whether that's singing hymns or the short neck buzzard song. Now I wasn't feeling so good about this guy. Even score, so I was pretty apprehensive at this point.

We finished up our time with him with questions, in fact, mom had a list of questions, and he had answered them all. He thanked us and left the room. His nurse then asked about scheduling. I told her I would need to check my schedule and would call her with a few days to work with. We then left the office.

I will divert here for a moment away from the day to touch on the spiritual side of things. I told you in the last posting there would be more, so here is more. I have a devotional book of sorts from theologian John Stott. Some folks love Stott and others don't share the 'love' for him. This morning before the surgeon hoopla, I was reading one of the devotionals. Stott was writing about 'living in the real world of constant pain and pleasure.' He was using a passage from Ezra 3. He writes about the Israelites return from captivity from Babylon, and as they return, they begin to rebuild the temple. "when the builders had laid the foundation of the temple of the Lord...all the people shouted with a great shout when they praised the Lord because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid." Ezra 3:10-11 In the following verses, Ezra 3:12-13, the author writes of the priests, Levites, and heads of households were crying for they had seen the previous temple and knew the new one would not compare. Some were shouting for joy while others were crying. Both emotions are valid and real, and both were happening at the same time. While one group was joyful to see the new temple was better than captivity, the other group wept as they compared the new temple to 'the glory of what once was.' So this is with everyone today. As people face situations with their jobs, marriages, families, and in my case this medical situation, they will have to choose how to respond. For me, I am 'captive' to this cancer. Soon I will be free from captivity and my body will not be the same as it once was. I can shout for joy that I am free from the cancer, or I can weep that my body is not the same as it once was, not as it was in the 'glory days of old.' I know which one I choose for my hope is in the Lord. Romans 8:28 (The Message) That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

So, back to the surgeon. Left the surgeons office, had a bite to eat with mom, and then went to the office. As I walked in, I saw a coworker outside at a porch table, so I went out. She asked me how the visit went. I told her about my apprehension. She immediately lifted me in prayer. That's what I needed. Thanks Jess! Well, about two hours later, I made the decision to schedule the surgery. Two awesome things happened after the decision. First, called the office and scheduled the surgery. The nurse called me back and....drum roll please....I get to sleep in before the surgery!!! Second, the office took an afternoon ice cream break and I got a cup of Mediterranean Sea Salt Caramel Gelato!!! The second greatest frozen dessert after Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla ice cream!

Sorry, I digress sometimes...surgery. Well, I got two good references for this surgeon and obviously he has experience, so at this point, I feel good about the surgeon.

Thursday, August 13th at 12:00pm at Presbyterian Hospital Dallas.

Prayer requests: Same ones as yesterday, plus pray for continued peace about this surgeon.

I'm thinking of having a going away party for my thyroid on Wednesday night. Any suggestions for themes?

JC